This was an interesting week for the dominance of emotions over logic. I wonder a bit at the timing and power of such overwhelming urges and their role in manifesting more than meets the eye. I spoke with my friends of this specific incident when I felt possessed to get a confirmation or closure related to a matter that was close to my heart. I literally felt pushed over the edge of logic and was ruled in the moment my fingers hit the keyboard to type up an email. I even watched in awe as I sent this email, nearly fully knowing that I might regret the action, it was highly likely to make no change in the situation, and could end up causing me more pain. I had this image later of angelic peer pressure causing me to act beyond my pride and self righteous indignation. I see now, knowing the result of this action that this truly ended up working to my advantage: closure, a better state of mind and the ability to move forward in a way that might’ve been more challenging if I had not been able to meet with this person one last time for this ‘confirmation’. I wonder even if my desire for this resolution trumped all the reasons for not making contact in the past 7 weeks. Who knows? All I know is that taking what could be perceived as a crazy, potentially humiliating action can often be the exact thing we needed to help ourselves move beyond a lingering, painful and confusing emotional situation. I hope knowing this might bring me or anyone else who reads this the courage to move past their pride, logic, judgment and self-protection with a situation that needs resolution. That scary and intense action might provide you with the relief and release you are seeking.
