Choosing to Float

So one of the things I've been doing to encourage myself is tracking the things I'm manifesting in my day. I think sometimes the little things are the easist to see or acknowledge.

I woke up and the first thing I saw was my computer. I immediately had a feeling of anxiety. If you've been trying to write a thesis like I am, or tie a good deal of your work and creativity into a computer, you may understand. I acknowledged that crappy feeling and tried to put my focus somewhere else. I opened the shade in my room and just let the feeling go so I could muster some excitement for my day. What do you know, that's exactly what happened. I don't know why, but I decided to go to the pool and swim. I've been wanting to do this for nearly a month. I even found a pair of goggles when I first decided to swim, but I didn't go. I did what I think a lot of us do- I let the enthusiasm pitter out, finding excuses and reasons not to do it. I don't like chlorine, I don't want to see myself in a swim suit, I don't want to get cold, I don't.... ya da ya da. But I lit a fire under my ass this fine sunday morning and off I went. I wanted a lane to myself, and I wanted to swim for 20 minutes. I got ready, whipped by the mirrors not caring to look or even think about my swimsuit. As I prepared to get into a lane with another swimmer, a gentleman got out and I was able to have my own lane. Lovely! I got in and the water felt great, it wasn't too strong in chlorine, and the swimming was so much fun. Ok, so I got my ass kicked at first-out pacing my capabality, I spaced I was in the deep end and gulped a bunch a water when I sunk, but I kept at it. I even swam for 10 minutes longer than I had originally planned, and I almost didn't want to get out of the water. The sunlight came in to one section of the pool and when I saw it under water it reminded me of diving. So as an added bonus I was able to be reminded of one of my goals which is to go scuba diving soon. I remembered what Bob Doyle said on The Secret about doing what you can to get into the feeling of having what you want, so incidentally I benefitted from swimming in pool that was no where near the Caribbean. If I pay attention and look for what pleases me, I find them. I'm going to make a concerted effort to look for what I want to see. A positive feedback loop is bound to develop- see sunset feel good- see red cardinal in tree feel good-see sunshine feel good-get positive feedback on my thesis feel good.

Ok so maybe I'm gushing a little, but it's so much better than sitting around worrying about all the crap that could go wrong- as it builds and builds and barrels toward me like a freight train. I may not have a great days all the time, but I'm certainly not going to try and put it out there anymore as a command.

My quote for the day is:

"Keep your face to the sunshine and you cannot see a shadow" Helen Keller ( Secret Master)